"In Skull & Bones we used to do this thing called a 'cup check' to the Catholic guy. It went something like this. Rick, put your hand down you're ruining my best joke."
...and as the President explained the danger of judicial activism, the Senator silently prayed to God for the strength to resist the returning temptations.
George, why don't we put the crayon away for now? You can finish coloring after you tell these nice people all about your conversations with our Lord and Savior.
..."Homosexual acts are part of a deviant class of sexual behavior and should be regulated"... Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you my nominee for the Secretary of the Interior, Senator Santorum!
Dick Cheney isn't available, so Rickie-boy here will help me sign this autograph. I never did go for that liberal elitist stuff like readin' and writin'.
"That's it, Mr. President ... a little to the right ... keep going ... keep going ... now finish it off ... with a flourish ... and that's how you sign your name."
As Rick Santorum demonstrates the latest Diebold touchscreen voting machine, George Bush remarks, "Look! It lets me vote for the Republican ticket twice!"
"Hey, remember how Steve Martin used to do that 'Great Flydini' bit on the Carson Show? Let's see what I can pull out of Ricky's pants! I'll betcha he's got a rabbit down there, heh, heh."
"In the Middle East, two men holding hands is a sign of trust between the two men, but here in the states, I just get off on it and can't wait to Jack this Big Boy Off!"
[AP Photo] -- President Bush and Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) announce their "enduring love that can no longer be denied" to a stunned audience of GOP faithful. Minutes later, after the President publicly signed divorce papers to be served on Laura today, the pair departed for a weekend getaway to what Santorum described as "our secret love nest, if you know what I mean."
[NY Times Photo] -- August 25 -- Following announcement of their intention to divorce their present wives and move in together, the President serenades Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) with a moving rendition of "I've Got You Babe." The audience of GOP faithful, initially stunned by the news, rallied at the end with extended applause.
"Georgie . . . now that we're sharing this tender moment, I was wondering if we should push for the legalization of same-sex marriages. What do you think? Oh, put that thing down, Mr. Microphone! Can't we ever have a second for just us?"
During a GOP educational seminar, Republican top dog President Bush demonstrates the proper way to pass off folded hundred dollar bills to elected officials. The GOP has staged several such events in response to recent financial scandals within the party.
"'Jesus loves me this I knooow...' Take it, Rick!"
George: "Is there a difference?"
Why does my SOUL feel so bad? ...
MY copy of 'My Pet Goat' -MINE! You already read yours.